I was looking back over a journal that I was writing in when we first moved here to Jefferson City and I was really amazed. Back then, I was very confused about the paths on which God had us. But, just like always, he has given us joy for the ride that we're on in the form of Lilian. I don't normally do quotes, but this little song that I used to sing when I was little in church just popped back into my head and I feel it very pertinent to our situation now.
"Something beautiful, something good;
All my confusion He understood.
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife,
But He made something beautiful of my life."
I really do believe that. She has brought so many changes along with her, some which I didn't know if I was going to get used to. But, she's just a little bitty vessel being used by our loving Father to mold Sean and I. And gladly, we're softening more every day.

I was going through Lilian's baby book last night, filling in all the new things that she has done, and I just can't believe how much has happened. She's no longer this little adorable Eskimo baby blob that just sits and stares at me. She's a mover and a shaker and she's so joyful to be around. She's working on her upper teeth right now I think. I can feel them in there a little when she's chomping on my finger with her little bottom teeth. She still sits up wonderfully and for longer periods of time every day. She loves coming into the bedroom in the morning after Daddy wakes up (just like the picture) and laying next to him while he's still drowsy. She gently touches his face and does this really soft talking that sounds like some little tiny person far far away. It's so cute. When he looks at her and smiles it's like she comes alive. Then she starts talking loudly and giggling with him. She loves us so much...it's overwhelming! If she only knew how much she's loved...My parents always said that I'd understand their love for me when I had a child of my own. It's so true. And to think God loves us more than Sean or I love our daughter. How? I know he does, it's just hard to imagine.
One of her new things is jumping. Ok, so she can't really jump, but she's trying! She loves to stand up while we hold either her hands or waist, but lately that hasn't been enough to satisfy this girl. She bends her knees and droops her little diaper bottom to the ground and then shoots up and out toward whatever she's trying to grab. Normally it's one of us, but once it was the mirror and she was super confused.
She's eating her cereal really well now. She gets all excited whenever I scoop up a new bite now and opens her mouth really wide to chomp down on it. I must say, I'm getting really good at getting food in that ever-moving little trap of hers too. She's tried sweet potatoes and applesauce. Soon we'll move on to other veggies and fruits, but for now we're doing just fine.
We're starting to go through a little separation anxiety all of the sudden. I can leave a room for a minute, but if she happens to notice that I'm gone it's "eeeeeEEEEE??" and then "waaaaAAAAA!!" She's doing great, but naps have been harder again and at night sometimes she just wants me to come in and visit. I do, and I try to reassure her and she usually just falls asleep, but last night she made more of a fuss. I got her out of her crib and held her in the rocking chair with me and she just spent about 5 minutes touching my face and drinking a little more milk. I put her down again and she went right to sleep. I know what she's going through. Sometimes I miss her so bad at night. I go to bed and lay there and wish she could be my teddy bear. I want to smell her and just hear her little sleepy noises. AAAhhh. What a baby. She's a keeper.